Trump Is a Warfare Hero (However Solely in His Memes)
Picture: Jabin Botsford/The Washington Publish/Getty Photos
The dad or mum firm of Reality Social simply launched Reality API, a service that gives a “direct, licensed, real-time feed of the platform’s most market-moving Truths,” based on Trump Media & Expertise Group interim CEO Kevin McGurn. Principally, a handful of Wall Avenue merchants are paying as a lot as $100,000 per 30 days to get entry to Donald Trump’s posts inside milliseconds, as my colleague Matt Stieb defined:
That will not sound like a six-figure product to a standard individual. However to high-frequency merchants shopping for and promoting on the fraction of a blink of a watch, it may very well be well worth the funding. Trump makes information on Reality Social. And now an organization he owns 41 % of is promoting that information to Wall Avenue so it could act on it earlier than anybody else can. Excessive-frequency merchants want this knowledge quick to have the ability to win a recreation the place the primary pc to get the brand new data of their algorithm wins. On the planet of the HFT, “pace turns into the tiebreaker,” says dealer Haim Bodek.
The president cashing in on giving Wall Avenue companies early entry to his bulletins is clearly regarding. Senators Elizabeth Warren and Adam Schiff have already requested the the Securities and Change Fee to analyze this “outrageous abuse of the President’s workplace for his private profit.”
However in the event you’re anxious that the appalling monetization of Trump’s posts will alter the contents of the president’s feed, concern not: It’s nonetheless stuffed with breathtakingly delusional memes.
Reality API went reside on Saturday. You may assume Trump would attempt to show the service’s worth by specializing in “market-moving Truths” for at the least a number of days. And he did make some information on Reality Social over the weekend, from taunting Iran to arguing with Jeanine Pirro about Reflecting Pool vandalism. However these posts have been buried in a sea of self-aggrandizing AI slop.
Lowlights from Trump’s dozens of weird weekend posts embody a shot of him asserting his marketing campaign for an unlawful third time period after invading Vincent van Gogh’s The Starry Evening with a military of wine-chugging MAGA clones:
This picture of Trump forcibly kissing a crucifix:
A repost of that point Trump imagined strolling by Space 51 with a completely nude, surprisingly jacked alien in handcuffs:
This shot of Trump main troops into battle throughout the American Revolution, regardless of his debilitating bone spurs:
A repost of Trump gazing adoringly at his youthful self. (To be clear, that is tailored from a photograph of Trump attending navy college, not serving within the precise U.S. navy):
A really regular picture of the president of the US as Elvis Presley:
This publish wherein Trump bragged about profitable one other golf match at his New Jersey golf course resulting from his pure “expertise” and complained he’s “given little or no time to apply,” regardless of {golfing} 125 out of the 561 days since his return to workplace:
And this shot of Trump scribbling on a map with the ghosts of Abraham Lincoln and George Washington:
Maybe there’s some strategy to filter most of these posts out of the Reality API feed. If not, all these corporations are actually getting is an early peek into Trump’s AI-slop-fueled psyche. And what they’ve discovered thus far is he’s jealous of Lincoln and Washington, he can’t cease excited about aliens, and he desperately desires to repost that picture of himself as Jesus. I might’ve advised them that, and my consulting payment is significantly lower than $100,000 per 30 days.
